Kill'em All

I brought home a mosquito swatter last week. We still have those mosquito repellants, vaporizers and nets, but this seems to be a contraception designed to kill mosquitoes and to satisfy our anger toward those parasites.

It gives me immense pleasure to sit watching TV and casually electrocute one mosquito after another. They literally burn to death. Their bodies seem to explode into little pieces. Those buggers deserve death for biting me.

There have been few other gadgets that one would relish using for the gore quotient. One example I remember is what they call the “pestoflash”. It similarly electrocutes flies to death in convention halls and small hotels.

But in the latter, the gadget would be placed in a corner and flies would flock to the blue light and die a very voluntary but gory death.

But the all new mosquito swatter is better in delivering a mental kick to the user.

a. one can kill a number of flies and count them too
b. one can sit idly and really have a good time
c. one can buy it at 100 rupees with a rechargeable battery
d. one can walk in the road carrying it around and kill flies all the way during the evening walk
e. it is shaped like a tennis racquet, so one can practice serves, forehands and backhands offhand too
f. one can, above all, abuse little mosquitoes when they are dying

These past 3 months have seen these swatters enter every household in chennai. One can buy it from any street corner. I can even now hear the tut, tut from a similar thing from my neighbors’.