Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Of Men and Morals

We were in Singapore last month, our team of 15 people, forming the core of the Mahindra business in the 4 southern states. All of us are educated in premier institutes. All engineers from Anna University, MIT, premier MBA institutes.

We had all gone out on sight seeing on the 1st day and were back in the hotel. Went out to for some shopping and were back for a drink at the hotel.

The second day was again full of sight seeing, with the Jurong Bird Park and Sentosa Island Resort forming the highlights of the trip.

We got back to the hotel at 9 pm, and all sat together for a drink, including our boss, who had come with his family. Had a rollicking time. Till then everything went on fine.

It all started at 10 pm, when some people wanted to explore the night life of Singapore. Me and my partner in customer care, Mr. Nagaraj, stayed back. I was having one drink after another and we were conversing different topics.

At 11 pm, there was a knock, and 3 people came running inside the room. They were looking extremely scared and one of them, a drinker, wanted a drink to calm his nerves. He had a drink and then started narrating what happened to them in their quest to explore the night life of Singapore.

They had all left in taxis, and asked the drivers to take them to some night clubs and one of the drivers was Tamil. He took them to a place where night life, in its literal sense, was being lived.

Mr. Uday was sitting in a table in a bar with a beer. He was looking at the women in the club. Suddenly, a girl came and sat on his lap. She was looking extremely pretty. Uday kept gazing at her, unable to realize that a girl other than his wife was sitting on his lap.

He realized the gravity of the situation and managed to will himself to get off the seat. 3 more guys of a similar disposition and Uday managed to get out of the setup and scramble home to the safety of the taxi. They were back and Uday was shaking from head to toe.

He as scared. He was tempted to buy the woman a few drinks and pay her money to get laid. The temptation lasted a minute and it was a moment of realization for him of his weakness and his strength of morality as well. He was shaken and badly mauled by the experience.

Let us now see what happened to the other 10 people who were exploring the night life of Singapore.

They bought the drinks for the girls, paid them the money, and got laid.

I would recall the instance of one guy, one of my team in TN. He has a son, whom he apparently loves. The drinks and the sex had cost him S$150. He did not buy his son anything from Singapore.

The other guy from TN, 28, got married in 2007 December. His wife is having an issue, 7th month. It cost him S$150 to get laid. He did not buy anything even for his wife or for home. He was the same guy who specialized in taking snaps of asses of women in short skirts and shorts, and boasted about it.

Some people go to prostitutes to get laid alone. Paying for sex, I think, is the basest thing anyone can do with their life and character. Making love and having sex are 2 different things and are confused to be the same thing.

One difference between animals and humans is that the longevity of a relationship lasts beyond the mating process. The relationship is based on love and sex is just an outcome of the love, of acceptance and of an emotion of conduciveness.

When a man pays money for sex, he is not only maligning his own morals, but also jeopardizing the love of his family. Who was a loving father has every possibility to turn into a monster. When money leads to sex, a vital link in the evolution of man’s mind is violated. It leads to guilt and diseases, to the mind and to the body.

What I realized was that no matter what your education is, how much you earn, what your wife does, men require sex for the thrill of the primacy or novelty of the situation or life. A guilty person can’t be a good father or a mother, as a lathe can't turn a square hole.